…entre nous soit dit…

between me you and the gatepost.

once upon a time…

Effy: From the moment I saw you, I knew it would be the closest I’d get to being… close. I didn’t know what to do with that feeling… happiness.
Freddie: Listen Effy, you are closest –
Effy: But they know now! And they’re hungry, really fucking hungry. Because for as long as I know they’ve been chasing me, and now they’re ready, now they’re strong enough to break through. And I can’t fight them. I used to be able to when I was strong but you’ve made me weak. And now I can’t, I can’t.

July 27, 2010 Posted by | depression, disapointment, happy, life, Quotes by People, skins | Leave a comment

6 hours to go…

Alright it’s currently 3.10am and it’s just less than 6 hours to go until my first exam… and I have to get another 1500 words of another assignment done (and thats forgetting about the OTHER two assignments still overdue and not done… *sigh*). It’s looking like an all nighter which isn’t good for my sleeping patterns during exams. And not good for my study. My fault though for wasting study week on watching so many crap tv shows and movies.

I did just have a rather happy thought though. 

I’m not usually really superstitious or anything (apart from the normal try not to break mirrors or walk under ladders etc), but at the same time I see no point in pissing off kharma or whoever is up there or out there. Whatever. So in exams I make little rituals for myself that I hope and think give me good luck (and hopefully writing about them here won’t jinx me now). If nothing else, they’re just little things that make me more relaxed. 

  1. I always wear my converse.
  2. Every school exam I wore my school uniform (except maths which I didn’t have a care in the world about so I wore my PJs)
  3. During my final high school exams I used the same pen for every one of my exams until it ran out in the last one (and I had to use another similar pen haha)
  4. I always take in something that reminds me of the ones I love the most.

I was thinking about the last one just then – preparing in my head a list of all the things I need for tomorrow (today). For my granddad I have my locket  – which I always wear everyday anyway; my Dad I now take in a little dragon charm that represents my college – something he shares with me; my Mum – well I can take in virtually anything really haha but usually I count it as my charm bracelet; my sister I always wore a pearl bracelet of hers that I took years ago and she never noticed it was missing; there was a time when I used to take in this shitty little homemade bracelet for Jane, but that’s now buried in a box I keep; and the last thing I used to take in was a small orange guitar pick with a little snow flake on one side – that was always for Dom. Even in year 11.

But I realised I don’t need to do that this time. This time I’ll have my necklace with dragon, locket and paris charm (for petia), my charm bracelet, and every time I get stumped and mind blank, I’ll be able to look at my hand for something else. It’s not a guitar pick this time haha. Usually I would put it on my necklace, but this time I want to be able to see it easily.

Yay.

I hate exams. But I don’t think this one will be so bad (fingers crossed I didn’t just jinx myself). It’s only first year Creative Writing after all haha 😀

June 7, 2010 Posted by | exams, happy, moods, university | Leave a comment